Inconsolable feeling >,_,<

I wanna let feeling go without a word, but i'm inconsolable.

I try to sleep...but the images keep popping up. It's disturbing me.

Keeping the feeling inside me is like...keep pumping gas into the baloon.

I wanna explode...It's killing me.

But I can't find the words to say it out...and it seems like there is never a right chance.

I'm incosolable because the sound is still in my ears, the words and the images are still in my mind. And I still can feel it in the dark of night while everyone is sleeping.

The silence can't comfort me until the tears run down my face from my eyes and hit the pillow...when noone sees.

That's the reason why I scare of the dark and the silence...bc it's the time when the inconsolabe feeling returns. Then the sadness grows and nothing can comfort me until the tears cover my face.

I need to keep my mind occupy...I need to get my body exhausted...so I can fall asleep when I need it.

"I don't wanna be like this. I just wanna let you know. That everything I hold inside is everything I can't let go."